You seem to have met the perfect guy. The only problem is that you only talk online or via text. What should you say to a guy through chatting to make him like you? Keep reading to find out how to make a guy fall for you through just chatting. If he is attracted to you on some level, these tips can help you capture his heart and discover if a relationship is possible.
1. Ask Questions
Think about a bad relationship or friendship that you’ve been in where the person hogged the attention. Every time you tried to say something, they interrupted you or didn’t bother to listen to what you have to say. This type of response feels awful, so the last thing that you want to do is act that way to someone you like.
By asking questions and really listening to what he has to say, you can make him interested in you. Everyone likes to share stories about themselves and talk about their dreams. By asking questions, you show that you are genuinely interested in him. He will feel flattered that someone wants to hear about his day, his dreams for life and his favorite things. Plus, asking questions helps you get a conversation going.
Asking questions also places the focus on him, so you do not have to stress about what to say or how to say it. In his mind, you will seem mysterious and intriguing. You will seem like an onion that he is unwrapping layer by layer. When you ask him questions, he will reciprocate and want to learn more about you. Before long, you will have amazing conversations together and get to share all of your thoughts.
One caveat, however. Do not ask negative questions that make him feel bad or make him dwell on a negative part of his life. You can talk about those things later on in the relationship. Initially, you want to skip out on any questions about his past relationships.
2. Be Positive
People generally like someone with a positive, optimistic attitude. This type of personality is comfortable to be around, so they are magnetic to the opposite general. After all, you generally want to be around people who make you happy, right?
The same thing is true for the guy you are chatting with. He will want to talk to someone who is happy and upbeat. Everyone has a bad day from time to time, but you want most of your conversations to be about happy things. Make him feel good when he is around you, and he will want to keep talking to you.
3. Be Secure
This is actually much harder than it sounds. Relationships can make you feel insane, and MRI studies actually back up this claim. When you go through a break up, your brain scan looks like you are temporarily insane. While it might not be easy at times, try to be secure and confident in yourself.
If a guy does not text you for a few hours or a couple days, don’t panic and send him 100 texts. This will only serve to drive him away if he had a good reason for disappearing. Not everyone likes to text, and work can easily get in the way of a text conversation. Relax, be secure in yourself and don’t worry about it. If he stopped texting because he isn’t interested, texting him more isn’t going to help.
Of course, you have to watch out for the opposite problem as well. Thanks to a lifetime of women’s magazines, there is a misconception about playing hard to get. Contrary to popular belief, most guys do not want a woman who plays games or manipulates him. Don’t try to make him jealous or play hard to get. Think of it this way: Even if that technique works, you end up dating a guy who wants someone to manipulate him and play mind games. Do you really want that type of partner? Probably not.
4. Don’t Talk About Other Guys
This is a follow-up to the last step and is pretty self-explanatory. When you chat with a cute guy, the last thing you want is for him to talk about all of the hot women in the room and the sexy girlfriends that he has had before. If you don’t want a guy to do it to you, don’t do it to him. For most guys, talking about how many guys like you or how hot other guys are is an immediate turn-off.
5. Find Commonalities
Have you ever noticed how easy it is to talk to someone who has the same interests as you? If you are on the swim team, you can spend hours talking about the sport and crazy practices. If you love yoga, it is easy to talk about your recent yoga class or the retreat you really want to go on. When you find commonalities with your crush, it makes a conversation easier to maintain. It also means that your future relationship is looking bright. If you have a lot of things in common to talk about, you are more likely to have a strong, lasting relationship someday.
6. Be Yourself and Have Fun
When you go to any dating website, they’ll often tell you that a guy wants a woman who is mysterious or intelligent or loving—take your pick. This is really the wrong way to go about it. You are who you are. By the time you hit your 20s, your personality is fairly set in stone for the rest of your life. You could try to be mysterious or ultra-compassionate for a few dates, but you wouldn’t be able to maintain that forever if it isn’t who you truly are.
Don’t worry about who you “should” be. You want to attract a guy who you can stay with. You could pretend to be someone you aren’t for a while, but he would eventually discover the real you and end the relationship. The best way to attract a guy who matches your personality like a puzzle piece is to be yourself. If he is someone who would work well with your personality, he will fall for you and want to be with you. If not, then it would never have worked out anyway. Have some fun, get to know the guy and see where things go.