When you like someone, it is only natural that you would want to talk them. Unfortunately, it can be hard to figure out how to approach your crush for the first time. You are afraid of seeming ridiculous or getting rejected, so you hold off on talking to them. At the same time, you know that you may never get to be with your crush unless you make a move. After all, they could be just as afraid about approaching you. If you need to know how to approach your crush for the first time, the following tips can help.
Making an In-Person Approach
Years ago, the only way you would approach your crush for the first time was in person. Now, people often use texts or social media instead. We will start with making an in-person approach before moving on to other ways. If approaching your crush makes you especially nervous, try bringing along a friend for backup. They can help keep the conversation going if you suddenly become tongue-tied. Also, your friend might be able to introduce you to your crush if they already know him or her.
1. Check Your Clothes
You want to make a good impression, so start by checking your hair and clothes. Make sure that nothing is in your teeth and that you don’t have bad breath. If you look good, it will give your confidence a boost. When you do approach your crush for the first time, smile. Even though you are nervous, try to smile and project confidence. This will help your crush to relax and feel natural around you.
2. Don’t Hesitate
The longer you wait, the harder it will be. If you hesitate, it will give your brain a chance to think about all the ways that this could go wrong. Your anxiety will only get worse with each passing minute. Instead of hesitating, take a deep breath and dive in.
3. Introduce Yourself
We have all read corny pick-up lines. While some of them sound good, the reality is that the easiest, most effective pick-up line is to just introduce yourself. You just want to seem like a normal, likable person. Say hello and introduce yourself if you have never met. Try to talk as normally as possible. If you need an excuse to talk to them, try asking about a homework assignment at class or how their weekend was.
4. Look for an in
What do you know about your crush? Are they on the volleyball team or in the chess club? Did you notice that they carry hiking gear in their car? Use this information to break the ice. Your ice breaker will work even better if you share a passion for the same sport or hobby. If you both like some of the same things, it will make a conversation much easier to maintain. Plus, it is a good sign for your future relationship.
5. Ask Questions and Really Listen
Unsurprisingly, most people enjoy talking about themselves. It is extremely flattering when someone wants to sit down and listen to you share your favorite stories. When you approach your crush for the first time, try asking them questions about their dreams, goals, hobbies and personal interests. Then, listen attentively to the answer.
Asking questions works for two reasons. First, you are probably nervous, so this takes some of the pressure off of you. If your crush is answering a question, you don’t have to worry as much about what you should say. Second, this approach can make your crush start liking you. Being listened to is flattering and makes you seem like a genuine, interesting person. Before long, your crush will want to talk to you about everything.
6. Try a Compliment
If you not sure about what to say, try giving a compliment. You don’t want a compliment that focuses on how sexy they are or their body though. This type of compliment can be uncomfortable to receive from a stranger and can make it seem like you are only interested in sleeping with them. Compliment your crush’s clothing, hair or face. If they have a specific talent, compliment them on that.
7. Pay Attention to What They Say and How They Say It
Body language is extremely important. If your crush is leaning toward you, plays with their hair and keeps making eye contact, there is a good chance that they like you. If they seem distracted or are leaning away from you, they aren’t interested in having a conversation. Listen to what your crush says and pay attention to their response. Their body language is a giveaway about how they feel and if they want to keep the conversation going. If you can tell that your crush does not want to talk to you, move on. Make an excuse to leave if you have to and leave. It might be heart-wrenching to walk away, but a crush that isn’t interested is probably not going to become interested in the near future.
What About Texting?
If figuring out how to approach your crush for the first time is scary to do in person, try doing int online instead. Don’t be afraid to text them first. If your crush likes you, he or she is just as nervous about messaging you. The only way you will know if your crush likes you is to make a move and see how you respond. If they do like you, they will be relieved that you made a move for them.
Unlike an in-person conversation, your crush will not be able to tell if you are nervous. They also won’t be able to tell that you spent 20 minutes thinking about each answer. Take your time and have some fun. Start with casual questions about things like a class you have together, your interests or mutual friends. You can also send a funny meme to make your crush laugh and to break the ice. If they respond well, keep talking via text and see where the conversation goes.